Friday, October 22, 2010

natural hair...

*turning down my hearing aid*  in preparation of the boos & the hisses.

but i gotta ask. what is the big deal with the natural hair phase? it's just hair.

let me repeat. it's just hair.

it seems like every woman these days that don't rock natural hairstyles are obsessed with having "natural hair". while all the women who have had them all the time have disappeared in the masses of "newly" natural women who have invaded their personal style corner. it's become a fad instead of a statement. it's not even about, "not using chemicals". or "loving your kinky hair". it's turned into a, "eww you have a perm" thing.  or a "the dominicans talk too much shit while doing my hair" thing.

now i don't speak for all men. i don't speak for most men. i only can speak for myself with this. but honestly..i don't give 2 flying fucks on the back of a cockroach dragon what you choose to do with your hair. i don't care if it's natural. don't care if it's permed. afro'ed out. baby hair slicked down. juicy (i admit a jheri curl..will get side eye and a towel behind your head while at my house). twisted. braided. whatever..i don't care.

as long as it looks nice. and not just it's a nice style. but it looks nice on YOU. i'm so tired of chicks "going natural" to achieve styles they see on others. see in a magazine. plan to cut all their hair off. only to regret and bitch & moan about it after they do it.

i have gotten into a million discussions and even arguments, because i don't understand the big deal. i've been told..."you're a guy, you don't get it". what is there to get. i have natural hair, you don't. you are trying to explain to me the something i have, but you don't. and telling me i don't understand. no...i understand, just don't get why it's the newest thing since since punching babies..

going natural is not "achieving a style" it's simply rocking your hair in it's natural state. stop saying, "i'm going natural". if you aren't putting chemicals in your hair are natural. complete. done. the end. congratulations. hallelujah. stop soliciting praise for doing something so simple. there a millions of chicks that have been doing that for isn't new.

[october challenge: day#22]

*disclaimer. my blog was hacked by a grinch-like natural hair conversation hater. don't take my...his comments too serious.


Lisa Turtle said...


Black women and their is a very meaty subject. It goes beyond your simplification of it, reducing it to "it's just hair".

Do you know how many of us grown women don't even remember what our virgin hair looks or feels like? From the age of 12 or so, we're told that "straight hair is great hair" and up until the last few years, most of us have never even had the resources or the support system to learn to embrace our kinks. To you, it's "just hair" because the most you have to do is make sure it's brushed and lined up properly. For us, our hair makes or breaks our whole look (at least it does for me).

Let us rock. Let us embrace what's ours.

~Sheila~ said...

Alright, you know I'm gonna jump right in there and start with...

"i understand, just don't get why it's the newest thing since since punching babies.."

First of all...if you consider punching babies a new thing,...we may need to see what other new thing you can come up

Now, I'm not that into going natural. It doesn't mean much to me at all.
I need to be able to wash my hair without it taking forever to do something with it afterward(I don't know how to wrap it).
I've tried going natural (without cutting off my hair and starting over) but my arms felt like they were going to fall off trying to brush my hair in a ponytail.
I comb my hair according to my mood. I need simplicity and convienence when I'm on the go (and I'm always on the go...when I'm not napping).

Then I have to brush my daughter's hair...

For some people it's a big deal, for's not.

Jen said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Lisa Turtle said...

...and I say it in the nicest way, bro.

had to come back and add that, lol

tha unpretentious narcissist© said...

@lisa turtle: i know you do. that's the one thing i know. you won't desert me and get all sensitive like jessie. jessie was never a good sport. lol

but ah. my hair is very country bear ish. meaning i got hair. and i take care of my hair. i have the "dry" problems. and i have to find shit that works with my hair.

i admit i can't relate to the "not knowing my virgin hair" part. but is it really a big deal. like i've seen your hair. i've seen pictures when you had a perm. and pictures when you haven't. i've seen you complain about the struggle of going natural. but it doesn't really look like a struggle. your hair doesn't seem unmanageable or look different to me. so maybe i just wanna see what the fuss is about. if you (not you, but women in general) are having such a hard time..why?

@sheila: i don't punch babies. but i'm punching babies new?

and see i can respect that. i'm not knocking ppl going natural. i'm just saying, i don't see it as this hard ass process. i don't see it as a "brand new me" process. it's're just doing something different to your hair. that's it.

Monique said...

People forget that its about HEALTHY hair. I'm with you about ppl thinking its something new. It's not. Been going since the beginning of time but now it's more of a trend and not just about health. Sucks, I know but that's the way of the world. the hair nazis are in full effect. Besides, men aren't too hung up on how our hair looks as long as it doesn't look a mess. LOL

Anonymous said...

Heeey! Well I myself have natural hair and I tell ya...people make such a big deal about it.
I chose to be natural on my own and after doing research about exactly what I was doing to my hair. It was a personal choice and I saw it as an opportunity to grow, be bolder and really find myself in the journey. Oh its been a bit difficult...but I will be a year natural on November 30th. One thing I know is...Being natural maybe should be for everyone but not everyone is accepting of it or willing. To each their own. No one should be put down for having a perm or choosing to be kinky. It boils down to a personal choice. For me it has helped in the journey of self discovery..........and Im still discovering :-)
Loved the post!

Epitome said...

You know I had to come in and drop a cent or two...I. went natural because my hair 'wouldnt' or couldn't grow. I had some naomi campbell edge action going on from the repeated weaving/wigging my hair. And since it was always covered with fake hair anyway I figured what's the point of putting a chemical in my hair as well that sometimes burns my scalp and has taken my hair out on more than one occassion. As far as why we naturals celebrate it (us who are doing it not only for style purposes) is because , well, its hard to do, one has to leave what they've always know for 10, 15, 20 years or more and start all over, something that the majority of people have (relaxed hair) in favor of something that not many people really know about.

Isis said...

they say birds of a feather flock together...

a good portion of my male friends/cousins prefer natural hair, and all of them prefer real's not just words they say, the evidence is in the women they date/fuck/wife up.

my dude loves the fact that my hair is natural too.

it's kinda awkward with me, b/c my hair is curly so sometimes what guys find attractive about my hair is the fact that it's curly/soft/pretty/"good hair" as opposed to being attracted to the fact that i chose to say fuck beauty standards, i choose to be happy with what god gave me.

but back to the point. to you it's just hair. for others, it's more.
yes, there are some fashion norms that i conform to.
but the notion that every woman is supposed to have naturally straight, permed, pressed, and/or long hair is 1 i say 'fuck u' to. some guys are attracted to that b/c they recognize it as more than an aesthetic choice. other guys like you are more into aesthetics, & that's cool.

i see nothing wrong with natural hair being a fad. inevitably, some chicks will decide it's not for them. but yes, as much as i try not to be judgmental, any adult woman who has no idea what her natural hair is like and is afraid to see that...
is someone i feel sorry for (& wouldn't want exposed to any young black children).

i'm not a natural hair evangelist. i support ppl doing whatever they want. but i stay away from people who are afraid of or express dislike for natural hair.

tha unpretentious narcissist© said...

@monique: exactly. the "healthy" hair is the important part. the same women complaining about chemicals are the same ones pulling their hair out with all the damn twist and braids waiting for their hair to grow natural. and like you said dudes don't care unless your hair looks a mess. and usually in transition, is when it does. it's cool permed. it's cool natural. but in lol

@sj is so unique: thanks. and i agree i think it should be a personal choice. not a "everyone is doing it". that's my issue. the most obsessive people are the one's who are doing it because "everyone is doing it".

@epitome: i can understand that. thank you for explaining that. that's my question to women who say they are going natural. when i ask them why, they can't explain. it's one of those things where they give you generic answers and you're just sitting there with a blank stare. i don't mind yall celebrating, just saying i'm trying to see why it's a big deal because your hair is still you hair. you are not your hair.

isis: i support people doing whatever they want too. that's why i feel like "going natural" isn't a big deal. it's just a difference in hair styles to me. it's not a big jump to something extremely hard. it's not hard to let your hair be your hair. just let it do it's own thing. i love real hair. i love to touch it. run my fingers through it. but the truth (black) women don't want you touching their hair. so the fascination with hair is kinda gone.

UglyCleanBroke87 said...

You just had to go in on natural hair now, didn't you? I'm not going to say much since I already blogged about it, but I agree with the other poster that hair is a big deal for women. No one judges men or says you look like a girl if you decide to rock some cornrows. And for a woman who has relaxed her hair all of her life then cuts it down to nothing, that is a big step.

For the record, I chopped my hair off Friday night and I haven't bitched or moaned about it yet. ;-)

Krissy said...

Let me say, and I may be the only one but I agree with you buddy! I don't get the " going natural" thing. I don't understand why its a big deal or why its become such a fad. It kinda gets on my nerves a little bit. I think everyone should want healthy hair and take care of their hair, sure. But I also feel like its just hair! As long as you feel good about yourself rocking what you have then who cares. I've been "natural" my entire life. Never had a perm or anything so maybe because this is how I've always been I don't see the big deal. I've been rocking these waves/curls for almost 30yrs now.

And I think the statement "its just hair" works hand and hand with this new natural movement. That's ever so evident with all the bald chicks walking around. A few years bad a lot of these chicks would be caught dead without their weaves and now they have fades. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. If kinky/straight/afro'd/curly/weaved/permed/braided/loc"d hair makes you feel like the best you that you can be. Then rock what you feel. But it is, just hair.

tha unpretentious narcissist© said...

@uglycleanbroke87: i'm glad chopping it all off hasn't left you with regrets. and i'm NOT going in. i'm just saying. i love you women love your hair. i love you like to try different things. i'm just saying i commend yall for your personal journey. but i don't think yall are leading slaves the freedom. that's all i'm saying.

@krissy: i'm with you on this one buddy. beauty is in the eye of the beholder. and no matter how you rocking your hair it's just hair at the end of the day.

sunshinestar110 said...

I shall not hiss or boo @ this post because i was wondering the same damn friends have all given up on perming and turned to the natural thing...i asked why and they told me i don't understand because i have "good" hair....i kinda see it as a fade sort like when weaves were taking over..and lace fronts...and braids *shrugs*