Monday, October 4, 2010

counterproductive teaching...


well everyone knows (at least you will right now) i am no fan of public restrooms. honestly pissing is no problem. i can piss anywhere. but doing anything else...is a no-go for me. i'll hold my shit (literally) till i'm about to implode before i'd used a nasty ass men's restroom. men are different animals than women. you ladies probably say, "women bathrooms are disgusting too...". um. take the most disgusting woman's room and multiply it by 50. that's a regular man's bathroom. there is piss all over the floor from the door to the stall. there is shit all over the toilet. there is even shit right next to where the tissue is. like literally, shit already on the toilet tissue and on the holder..that's just how disgusting it is. imagine walking in and seeing a dead rat in the toilet. yes...that has happened to me.

so imagine my discontent having a 4 year old son who often has to go to the restroom. it's like confronting my nightmare every 15 minutes. and since he's a little boy, he can't use the urinals that are off the floor. so imagine my heart about to fall out my body when i saw him walk in the stall and lift the toliet seat with his hands.........

*moment of silence for my death*

now i'm sure lifting the seat has been ingrained in his head at home. but in the public restroom.....lifting the seat is like touching a dead person. you just don't do that. that's why the toilet is so nasty, cause NO ONE LIFTS the seat. NO ONE SITS on the seat. don't touch it.  so i'm telling him, "don't touch it". and he's repeating it as a question "don't touch it"? imagine someone walking in on the tail-end of this conversation. so i'm like, yes...don't lift the seat. don't touch it. just pee. so he pees and i walk him over to the sink and wash his hands till his light skin fingers lose 3 shades and he got white kid hands. so we walk out the bathroom. problem solved right? we go back before the end of the day..and he looks at me, "don't touch it?". and i say..yes..."don't touch it". ok. i saved my son from being a shit hand monster. the world is a better place.

so we get home. it's bath time, get ready to go to sleep time. so he takes his bath and i tell him to take a piss before bed. he goes over and starts peeing with the seat down. so i tell him, no...."lift the seat". and he looks at me and says, "don't touch it?"...lol



life lessons: try teaching a 4 year old that you're supposed to lift the seat at home, but not to touch it in public.




[october challenge: day #4]

8 comments:

Krissy said...

Aww poor confused mini you.

Alovelydai said...

My Dood is 4 too. Imagine how confusing he it for me to take him to the womens bathroom & then have Daddy take him to the mens bathroom. He doesn't know which bathroom to use. Poor kid.

Megan said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Megan said...

Sorry way too many typos!

LOL. OMG the horror. I have this convo with my son over and over. In the Ladies Room I prefer to take some tissue and lift it on my own for him.

Homeboy won't use a nasty bathroom though. My son had never peed on himself in his 5 years of existance until recently. 4 times. FOUR! And the last time I asked why he said he wasn't using that nasty bathroom.

Monique said...

Gawd I'm not looking forward to working on this with my son. LOL

xxxx said...

Trust I feel your pain.. LOL.. When I had to teach my little brother not to touch the seats and my little sister to squat when using the toilet it was never ending and repetitive, but they got a hang of it now..

tha unpretentious narcissist© said...

@krissy: yea he was a bit confused. but at the same time he's like.."i don't care..if you want me to piss on the seat..that's what i'll do.." lol.

@alovelydai: yea..my son goes to the ladies room with his mom too. don't think it matters to him right now. his mom is just a germaphobe i'm sure she probably makes him stand on the toilet seat and pee into it..that or she just lifts him up and lets him pee in the air. but i'm sure he don't touch NOTHING when he's with her.

@megan: lol..not my son. he'll touch nasty shit in a heartbeat. he'll go pick something up off the ground and i'm like.."where the hell did you get that from?" and i'll tell him to put it down and he'll look at me like, it's funny. i need you to have a talk with my son...cause i need him to have some kind of germ phobia lol

@monique: little boys take patience. don't have a girl, so i don't know if it's easier. but everyone tells me it's easier.

@xxxx: well i'm hoping this isn't a battle. cause my son is hardheaded. he be on one thing and will stay on it till he feels like changing lol. sometimes i gotta remind myself i'm the parent.

Sheena said...

I have a son also, that refuses to use any nasty bathroom and is getting to the point of wanting to go without assistance in public. I just make sure to state over and over again not to touch the seat and make sure to wash hands before exiting.