Thursday, June 3, 2010

to neck, or not to neck..

June Challenge (day #3)

ok, i admit..i used to be a v-neck hater. i used to say, "what kinda guy would wear a v-neck?". but that's only because of the old school v-necks. yanno the actual fruit of the looms t-shirts that are as thin as a piece of paper and the "v" exposes your nipple by mistake.

i do not co-sign v-necks that show cleavage. i do not co-sign v-necks that expose your belly button. i do not co-sign v-necks that shows your contracting abs because it's so tight it's doing crunches for you. these are not acceptable v-necks. i did not get into the v-neck game to share a shirt with my chick.

so what is acceptable? why did i decide to rock a v-neck?

actually what got me started was a black & gold v-neck from blac label. the shirt was calling me. but i had never worn a v-neck shirt before. but the shirt was crazy ridiculous & i was willing to try something new. so when i got the shirt it was wonderful. i couldn't believe it. so i go and get another v-neck from blac label, and the shit dipped down to my belly button. needless to say that shit did NOT stay on for more than 2 minutes. 1 minute in denial it was that low. 1 minute to laugh in shock and text my boys and tell them how gay that shit was. after that experience i became really particular about v-necks. so i came up with a few rules...and YES i expect everyone to abide by them...

rule #1: the v-neck must be made for a man. (no Unisex v-necks)
rule #2: the v-neck must be your size or a size bigger (no one thinks you have muscles. they think you have titties).
rule #3: if you nipples at any time are exposed or slip from the side, your belly button can be seen, or someone can do a body shot off your pecs the shirt is too low.
rule#4: if you can step through the top and pull it up over your legs, it's too wide..you're wearing a poncho
rule #5: you must not wear it to expose a tattoo (that's equivalent to women wearing v-necks to show off their breast...)
rule #6: the v-neck can't be girly colors. no pastels, no paisleys, no pinks..

if you follow these rules, you should be alright. why is this fad different than men wearing skinny jeans? because men wearing skinny jeans is not only hazardous to their sexuality. any article of clothing that requires you to pack your nuts into a pocket...can't be safe. v-necks when worn responsibly are great. it gives you a bit of maturity. think about it. what started the phase? the fact that dudes were wearing v-neck sweaters with their button ups. then they started wearing t-shirts when it got a little warmer under their v-necks. then it progressed. women like to see a little skin. and when i say a little i mean, your neck. cause let's face it, a lot of us don't hardly have them. especially the older we get...it starts fusing with the head & shoulders..lol. so v-necks shows a little neck, a little clavicle. but anything more...they'd rather you have your shirt off. a woman does NOT wanna see skin from a plunging neck line. so please "v" responsibly.

8 comments:

JStar said...

LOL....I am NOT for V-Neck or skinny jeans on men....Maybe I am old skool, but its looks sooooo gay to me....But hey, gay people are no longer hiding anyways since its become a Fad now days...Back in our days you woulda had to get your jaw wired shut like my brother did for even "looking" gay...So with straight guys wearing skinny jeans and v necks, its harder for us women to know who is straight and who isnt lol

birdie said...

The V-Neck is a very sensitive case by case basis. All V-necks ARE NOT created equally. But with the right fit and the right body type, they can be really sexy.

sunshinestar110 said...

LMAOOOOOOOOO I hate v-necks on men!! to me they are not very manly like and if your nipple happens to fall out while having a convo I shall never talk to him ever again in life. I have saw a do-able vneck a time or two but i would never buy the man in my life one!

Alovelydai said...

Wow I didn't know v-necking was that serious. I think I need to do a quick unscientific survey.

tha unpretentious narcissist © said...

@jstar: I feel you..they are not for everyone. My dad's been wearing vnecks for forever & I never once thought it was something i'd try. Kinda an aquired taste, to wear & for chicks to get used to seeing. When I first told my chick I had one on she was like..."ooookkkayy". But the "v" isn't deep at all & I've been getting nothing but rave reviews from the ladies (ladies, I might add)..lol

@birdie: exactly, they are not created equally..that's my argument. Mine are sexy..and I'm not just saying that cause it's mine lol

@sunshinestar110: again..I feel you. But in my opinion women should never "dress" men anyway, unless it's tshirts, drawz, socks, or cufflinks..stay away from being my coordinator.

@alovelydai: be my guest. As evident by these comments y'all ladies hate them lol.

stephanie said...

cause let's face it, a lot of us don't hardly have them. especially the older we get...it starts fusing with the head & shoulders..lol. ---- lmfao

ms.rubies said...

BUHAHAHAHAHAHA #4 defin pushed me over the edge...i cannn'tttt deal with it!

jazzyjaz said...

awww..The v-neck most men I hate them with a passion but once you find one that the v is a perfect length than you will fall in love with them. i had to teach that lesson to my ex he was always expecting his nipple to bless the world at the wrong moment but once I found him a good v neck his life just hasn't been the same!!