Sunday, November 4, 2012

i am thankful

day# 4: i am thankful for love..

i am thankful that i love, love. even when it doesn't love me i still seek it, want it, need it. i receive love from so many people, that i feel bad when i harp on not having it in the one area i'm lacking it in.

i struggled with this topic as soon as i saw it on the list. i wasn't looking forward to it, or had any clue of what i'd write. a lot of you know my stance on love, especially romantic love. i'm a hopeless romantic who wears my heart on my sleeve. when i'm in love, everyone knows i'm in love. i'm not afraid to share how i feel, what i want, or need.
i'm thankful i know what love is. i'm thankful i know how to love someone the right way. i'm thankful that my love is patient & kind. and i'm thankful that one, two, three, or even a million people couldn't spoil me on love if they tried. it's not love that's let me down, it's people. it's people who make empty promise, pledges, vows and take no personal responsibility for them. it's not God's fault for pointing me in the direction of someone who seemed deserving of my love. everyone deserves love. everyone deserves only the best love, they just don't understand that you need to return only the best love to others. so you get in situations where you know you're giving the best, to someone who isn't being fair to you. this is why life is full of lessons, experiences, and tests...and unfortunately i stay being someone's life lesson or experience. and the chicks i date stay being my test. how many heartbreaks does it take before you just give up? how many times can you be the good guy, and not win. no matter how hurt, bitter,sad, upset, disappointed, or angry love makes me, i still know that "that's not love" making me feel like that. so many people will nurse a heartbreak as if it's just a part of love. it's not. love doesn't hurt. love doesn't make you bitter, sad, upset, or disappoint you. people do. i'm thankful that despite my heart being broken that i still love, love. and i can see it, feel it, and receive it from everyone & everything around me. i endure my test, because one day i'll be rewarded for my diligence. and anyone i have loved will search forever for someone to love them half as much as i did. my test, your lesson.


Mo said...

I knew this one would be hard for you to do. One thing that's great about you and you said it best is that you aren't afraid of love. Not everyone is like that and we should. No matter how bad love hurts you, you want it and need it.That type of innocence results in a great love. Don't lose it.

Oh and this is my favorite line: i'm thankful i know how to love someone the right way. i'm thankful that my love is patient & kind.

★Starrla Monae☆ said...

Why would this be difficult for you?? You are like THEE poster child for this! At least that's how your posts about it display you to be. Excellent post!

tha unpretentious narcissist© said...

@mo: thanks, i'm trying to hang on to it. i appreciate your kind words. really, i do.

@starrla monae: lol @ the poster child. it's hard because i'm fresh out of a breakup. i say fresh because it still doesn't feel real. thanks.

Freckles said...

i was curious to see what you were going to say and I am thankful that your perspective has not been tainted. I too believe in love and continually do mybest to not allow someone that didnt love me the way i deserve to be loved affect how I trust and believe in love. great post as always.