okay, we all have them on our list (those of us on twitter. come on you stranglers...time to get on twitter). those folks who are doing the most on twitter.
this weeks #twitterkills thursday topic: people whose life revolves around twitter.
you ever been sitting there looking at your timeline like.."shit, what the fuck did they do before twitter?" yanno that person who is on twitter EVERY time you get on. it could be 9am...noon..7:34pm...1:23am...4:48am..etc. their ass is always talking about, "i'm going to bed..." but then you wake up in the morning and they are still tweeting..."ok, i'm going to be for real guys...". they may even try to fool you with, "i can't sleep....ugh" but they say that shit every night. the truth is they don't want to miss a second of twitter. they also don't want you to miss a second of their interesting but not interesting life. it's like come on...you've been on twitter 23.2 hours of the day. there is no possible way for you to have a life and be on twitter that much. like seriously. at some point or time in the day you have to be distracted by SOMETHING..anything. BIG or small.
your roommate has to come in your room naked and wipe their ass with your shirt. or your kids have to spill some shit all over the floor and table. your mom has to forget to pay the power bill & the phone bill at the same time and both your internet and phone access gets blocked. your dog may take an interest in fucking the sofa. something...even if it's very twitter worthy of tweeting. it will take your mind off twitter for a moment to *cough*actually live life *cough*. yes you can tweet about it later. yes it can be the topic of a great trending epidemic. but you have to get of at some point or time.
so look at your timeline. find that person who is ALWAYS on twitter and shoot that twitter fiend POW.. right between the fingers. make them tweet with their tongue or toes.