Friday, November 27, 2009

ManFive Friday #19

manfive friday topic of the week: why men don't like your girl-friends...

we've all seen the show. even us fellas who swear we'd never watch no shit like that. you gotta admit you flipped by it, watched it with your girl, or just so happen to have some baby oil out on your nightstand when it was coming on. i'm saying, it's was a show about four beautiful black women...i'm not gonna throw shade. women loved this shit, and yanno why? because most times it's hard for them to be friends with other chicks. so when they are friends guess what, that's a pretty strong bond.

a strong bond, that usually inflicts problems all up and down their relationship with you. i already went into why we don't like your "gbf" (gay best friend). here is five reasons why we don't like your chick friends.

#5: they be knowing too much of "OUR" business

ever walked into a room full of women and they just stopped talking and started smiling at you? i was under the illusion that women didn't divulge sexual secrets with each other. that yall didn't "share" your bedtime stories with your girls. shit, i was wrong as hell. women tell everything. your girl's bestfriend knows about your dick. she knows if you're a eater..good or bad. she knows that special thing you like..yanno.."that thing..". because these days women can't keep shit to themselves. but when chicks trust their friends...all bets are off. they aren't afraid their girl is gonna try to get some, it's all about the bragging or complaining.

#4: they're jealous

lets face it, sometimes your friends are jealous. it maybe something you don't see or understand. it doesn't even have to be about us. we can see when you're friend is just downing you or your life to make herself feel better. we can see that's she just mad she don't have a man herself. or she mad cause she's the "ugly" friend. or the "dumb" friend. or the "broke" friend. whatever their reason, the shit ain't right. and it makes it unbearable to hear stories over and over again about her talking about you. or her not being excited for you. or her going out and buying the same outfit and wearing it before you so you can't wear yours.

but wait it gets worse. what happens when your chick friend is jealous of all the time you're spending with your man? they want you to hurry up and break up or cancel with your man so they can have their movie partner back. they got the sad face on when they made plans to hang out with you and at the last minute you rain-check them to get you some. yea, they'll try to convince you, you're being a bad friend. when in reality, they are being a bad friend. they are too selfish of your time and don't realize that sometimes you'd rather spend that time with a hard leg, instead of eating ice cream and talking all night about nothing.

#3: they don't know shit about us, but got so much to say

think about it like this. imagine if my boy called you a hoe from jump. he ain't even said two words to you. he ain't been around you 3 minutes. he never gave you a chance. he just looked at you, and said.."she's a hoe". this is what your hating ass friends do off sight or after they hear one too many "one-sided" stories from you. "he's a dog", "girl, don't trust man works like that. he's cheating on you", "he ain't breaking you off with nothing, you need to stop messing with him..." etc.

needless to say, she popping her gums about shit she don't know nothing about. she don't know me from nobody else. for some odd reason she thinks i'm her boyfriend. or her ex. either way she's talking about somebody who is not me. she already doesn't like me and has never hung out with me. when did that shit become cool? go get something good in your life so you year long period can end. hat-err

#2: they offer you a different perspective sometimes something we don't want you to see

ok, i've talked mad shit up to this part. but truthfully sometimes your girls do be on. they do be right. they do see past mistakes you've made. they do know who you're dealing with. they have paid attention to all the warning signs you've ignored. sometimes all it takes is that intervention, "waiting to exhale" moment. your girls get together and have a "fuck that dude" party. and all of a sudden you ain't cooking no more, you're ignoring the phone calls, you're not putting up with the same ol' shit. it's like..damn why you gotta listen to her?

#1: they be running their mouth like they got a boyfriend...and they don't

worse one of all. any chick telling you how to successfully be in a relationship and she ain't in one, tell her to go suck on some soap, and blow bubbles. yes, it's true you don't have a boyfriend to speak on having one, but it would def help with your "relationship credentials". how you coaching someone and you ain't even in the game? you steady telling my chick how, "i'm just not that into her.." when from all the stories she's told me about YOUR dude...he just wasn't into you. obviously you don't recognize the signs that well yourself. that's why you're all up in our business. all your advice is, as if i was your boyfriend. step outside the situation. step outside your own life. and look at why YOU aren't in a relationship. good relationship or problematic relationship...trumps no relationship any day (notice i said problematic not bad...a bad relationship is worst then no relationship).


xxxx said...

number two is def a big reason why many, both men and women dont like their friend partners, it easy to spot things from the outside that sometimes cant be seen when you become too involved and are the one going through it.
number four jealousy is also a big deal. i had a friend of mine recently tell me that her homegirl told her she need to break up with her boyfriend. first thing i said was dont listen to her and dont do it. she just mad because she dont have a man and no longer have a club partner. i was kind of upset that someone who claims she is this girls best friend will tell her to break up with her boyfriend. just shady

tha unpretentious narcissist © said...

@xxxx: yup, yup. that shit happens all the time. i know chicks who would tell my girl, "you do too much for him..". and she'd tell me that and i'd be sitting there like.."wtf do you do for them to be acting like that?". don't sound like their mad you go all out (because you don't), sounds more like their mad they aren't your boyfriend and you're not giving them that time you're giving me. jealous chicks suck..

the.kisser said...

uh oh, i'm sooo guilty of number 5. i must admit i love divulging the deets, shoot i write posts about it...LOL.

great post.

Traci Lavette said...

Loved Girlfriends! Wish they wouldn't have taken it almost made me forget that was how the post began with all that knowledge you kicked LOL!

You are right though about the one-sided stories. We do get that from our girls, and it's all we have to go on. I was just put in the middle of a situation just like that and I didn't appreciate it one bit. She laughed it off, but now her dude is thinking I'm this 'bad influence' on the relationship b/c I commented on something to her - but only based on what she'd told me. But get this! He only found out about my comment because he was in her email. Need I say more???

Also correct is your statement about how we SHARE when we TRUST. So very true. You would think that some of the stuff we say aloud would snap that ass back to reality and in the right direction, but it doesn't (not enough anyway).

Thanks for your insight. Very enjoyable.

tha unpretentious narcissist © said...

@the.kisser: see. guilty, guilty, guilty.i mean ain't nothing wrong with it if everything good. but just imagine sitting there with your dude and he introduce you and his boy says, "oh she the one that like to grab your...". just and uncomfortable situation when they got a big mouth.

@traci lavette:thank you! it's easy to get that "bad influence" title cause all you gotta do is give her advice one time that goes against him. because we as men know that it takes a minute for yall to warm up to us if yall don't like us. yall aren't really forgive and forget people. if your girl says something negative that's your opinion of us until you really get to know us. which makes you a bad influence on them because you'll always affirming their suspicious cause we're "suspect" from the point of their first one-sided story.

sunshinestar110 said...

I hate to admit that you are so right about all 5 of those things. Now I can't co sign #1 cuz i never disclose the information but i have sat back and listened to my friends discuss there bedroom manner! but without our girlfriends we would be your problem all the time. for the same reason you dislike our girlfriends could be the same reason you could love em!

tha unpretentious narcissist © said...

@sunshinestar110: thank you, you started off right.."i had to admit you are so right...". and i agree sometimes the chick friends come in handy, but more time NOT. lol