Saturday, October 10, 2009

okay i admit it....i'm having a "meriod" moment.

before i start i have to give credit where it's due. i have to credit, ms. lovely... i'm using your coined term "meriod". it's when men act like they're on their periods and get all sensitive and shit. check out her ridiculously concocted theory here.

but back to my "meriod" moment. i dunno why, but i get upset when my chick gets excited about everything except me. i mean am i being too sensitive? really?

i mean i understand how chicks don't want to let you know all the time when they are excited. but when they let you know they're excited about everything except for shit that has to do with you. like "wow...i can't wait to hang out with my girls this weekend". it's like, why you ain't say that about me last weekend? or when you go out your way to do something and you're excited and then all you get a thank you & no more mention. it's not even on some ungrateful shit. it's just on some..."i just don't get excited over shit you do". and it's weird cause it's not just her. my last chick was like that too. which leads me to believe it's *gasp* me.

have i gotten to the point where i need to be appreciated like a chick? or is it i just haven't had that kind of appreciation in so long i want someone to give me some. i choose to believe the latter. maybe it's because i've been with chicks who really showed me they liked the things i did for them. not on some, "you're the greatest guy in the world" shit. but a generally sincere grateful, "i liked/loved it". i found that chicks would rather brag to their friends about shit their dude did for them then to just be like, "wow, i can't believe you did that...that was great". that's all i need. just a "that was great". or a "wow". it's the same way i feel about my son for christmas. it's like...him going down and seeing all the presents, hollering and passing out in excitement was the reaction i was going for. now if he would have just went looked at, opened, and said thank would have been fine. but him passing out made me staying up all night fixing toys and wrapping gifts worth it.

so i'm saying. me staying up all night getting shit together. me spending time trying to make something special. the thought behind flowers, not just random one's but your favorite. gifts that aren't over the top but personal, just because. it's called effort ladies. if you don't appreciate the effort. i'ma stop putting it forth. start being like other dudes who only do special shit on your birthday (if that)..

meriod moment, over.


insushiwetrust said...

[it's ice. i stay changing names]

this is so funny, i'm on the flip side of this right now with the new guy. the last guy i actually had a relationship with made the same complaint though...

to keep it short, for me i think it is a trust's not just excitement--i express a very muted version of all my emotions to a guy until i feel like we're "solid" (and that can take a LOOOONG time)...i mean express gratitude or enjoyment with my words but there's not gonna be a strong physical reaction (eyes lighting up, voice going all soft, cheesing) & i think it's just shielding...equally if you really hurt my feelings i'm not gonna cry or trip out, i will tell you my reasoning in a pretty emotionless tone & you can choose to either accept and apologize, or not.

i know this isn't a great way to be but as with any learned behavior, unlearning takes twice as long.

so maybe your girl is just sensitive and tryna protect her heart or not used to a guy who genuinely is trying to make her happy just because--rather than gassing her up in order to play with her emotions.

Ms. Lovely said...

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!So you admit it!!! LOL. "Ridiculously concocted"?! Methinksnot!

Alright,so here's my 2cents:

Men do need attention in a relationship. It's imperative If she doesn't give it, he'll be sure to find it somewhere else. And I don't think appreciation should be witheld because of past issues with trust. Ideally, upon entering a relationship you should try as best to check all your baggage at the door. Unfortunately carry-on's slip thru and ppl have issues that prevent them from showing affection. But I say If you appreciate your lady/ should show it!!! I find, when the trial period is over in a relationship all the bright eyes and excitedness (that's not a word, i know..) goes out the door. PPl grow comfortable and things are mundane after awhile..This calls for adding a lil extra spice or switching things up..Let you inner Ralph Tresvant out and get sensitive..Tell her know how you feel!

tha unpretentious narcissist © said...

@insushiwetrust: i feel ya. but i'm saying, what if it was you who went out of your way to do something? it's not a pride or ego thing. it's more of a, "i try to make this special, you don't like it?" thing. you trying to play it cool..isn't cool.

@ms. lovely: i plead the 5th, thanks for the loaner word tho. and thanks i agree with your comment. it's almost like a kid making you a macaroni card & being super excited and you just look at it and be like "thanks". i get excited about surprising or doing something for people. and it's a let down when they don't like it or appreciate it.

Tauni said...

NOOOOOO don't stop I just had hope dangit!;0)