yea, i've been slacking as shit. blame in on the 'roids. and their uncanny effect to make me feel like total shit. ok, man five is always changing and always on some different shit. i guess when it gets to where i'm trying to make it it'll be more consistent. until then, hang in there with me. this week it's a man five rant.
man five topic of this week: why a dude can't be more romantic
now..if you ask my past girlfriends who's all about romance, they'll point to me. i'm a very romantic dude. now..i know they'll be a few bitches (only bitches cause they disagree) who'll disagree on some difficult shit, but they know ain't no dude did no shit for them like me. as a boy, i watched my dad cake for my mom. now, i'm not saying romance is simply about spending money. because to me, that's the easy part. going some place and saying, "give me the most expensive ring, biggest diamond, popular bag, etc.." is simple. it was just that he went out of his way to get her things and to make her day special. now he's NOT the king of romance, because um..that would be me. but it showed me that you have to take time & put in effort for women. so as a young buck..i made some HUGE romantic mistakes.
mistake #1: i overdid it.
i used to celebrate our "month" anniversaries. i sent her mom a thank you card on mother's day. i used to bring her, her sisters & her mother flowers every time i came over to see her. i would "make" gifts that were personal special & so so so gay-nice.
mistake #2: i did it when it wasn't deserved.
romance isn't owed to every woman. i used to be under the impression that you just floss a chick out just because you love her. it doesn't matter that she treats you like shit. or that you have to vie for her affection. it doesn't matter that she's probably playing you. i thought that as a man, you owed that respect to women. it wasn't till i had been trampled upon numerous times did i find that bitches don't get shit. so if you gonna be a bitch, please...get off me. as a man, i owe respect to a woman who acts like a fucking woman not a little girl, hoe, bitch, slut, tramp, heffa, etc. etc.
mistake #3: playing into "my ex boyfriend did this.." game.
ok, we all know men lie right?...well guess what so do women. i hate when a chick tells you all this wonderful shit her ex boyfriend "usta" do for her. it's like...um..really?. and it's always said as a seg-way into what you're not doing for her that she "usta" like. so yes, even i. king of romance fell into that bullshit fake ass game. where you try to outdo a past dude. but in the back of your mind you're thinking.."that nigga ain't really did that shit..." then you see an episode of "Charmed" on USA and realize where the fuck she got that idea from. yup, i played that.."i'm better than you ex-" game for like 2 minutes then said.."this is dumb as fuck...if that dude was so great why the fuck you with me right now?...get a fucking remote control and press skip".
Nevertheless, i've come to the conclusion that being romantic is a state of mind. why aren't guys romantic anymore. could be endless reasons. some being that they learned just like i did from past mistakes. women don't make it easy for you to do shit for them these days. there isn't a "i'm going to impress you stage" anymore. women are so not impressed with shit these days that you gotta jump through a spiked hoop on fire spinning at 80 mph, 20 feet in the air. you can't just buy a chick flowers and watch her face light up. now adays it's..
"i don't like roses..", "flowers die, i don't see the beauty in that..", "he only got me one rose..".
you can't buy them random gifts. because then they think it's random gift time all the time. it's like they open the door and you can see them looking behind you for gifts, get in the car they all opening up your glove box, checking between the seats. it's like.."wtf are you looking for?". you can't take them places cause they don't think it's romantic to go out to eat in a nice small intimate location unless it cost $240 a plate. you can't plan a "night in" cause that's being cheap. thanks to the death of chivalry & guys who mama taught them how to treat women. you can't send them love notes, cause they don't know what love notes are or mean.
there is a unrealistic fantasy women have concocted in their heads based off of what they see in tv shows & movies. they want things to happen like they do on tv. and it's like..umm i'd like things to happen like they do on playboy too. i walk into a store, women just get naked and jump on me to have sex. but come on..let's be for real. i once sat and watched a chick cry off of some shit that happen in a movie that was "so sweet" that i had already done for her. when i did it for her she wasn't crying. she wasn't excited. she wasn't like.."that's so sweet..". but to watch this dude do it on tv..she is crying. W T F?
i've also had a chick doubt my romantic tendencies, when i hadn't had a chance to show her. it's like...forget i send you flowers, forget i give you cards professing my love to you, forget i try to brighten your day with ridiculous snacks you love, forget i wrap presents with gay ass heart paper & bows. i'm saying..your last dude would buy you tic tacs as a gift, leave it in a walgreens bag, w/ the receipt in it. i'm already 10 miles ahead of that. just wait and do right, and you'll get all the shit you want & need.
------------------*side note: i must draw a division line between married and single women. married women LOVE anything you do for them because they are used to you not doing shit most the time. this is a single girl issue. -------------------------
3 comments:
I think your touching two differn't issues. Romance and dedication verses spending money and not being cheap. Do you think it's because women don't set there standards and so many would just settle for average nothingness. Or do you think it's because woman set there standards to high and don't appreciate and value effort. I think spending money on things is not as important as putting your all into someone. Of course you shouldn't be a bum that can't do anything for me. But I would appreciate if you didn't act like spending money should make me love you. But your right Chivalry is Dead!
Yeah, I do appreciate all that Angel does for me and I bitch that he doesn't do it enough. Give me flowers. I love flowers. I give Angel flowers too. Always have. He felt weird about it at first but I was like. Whatever...here's flowers. (Then I can put them in our room so he can enjoy them more and at night).
My gift from him this weekend is getting in the yard and possibly putting up a divider fence so we can grow some grass on a side of our house. Our dogs really tear up the yard.
I don't think Chivalry would be dead if people were appreciated more.
Danielle:
it's two different issues that are pretty much aligned together. dedication & romance do dictate spending money or being cheap. i think women set global standards not indivdual one's. because of this when a guy doesn't meet their "global" standard they right them off as not being romantic. i also think that when a chick lowers her standards due to be disappointed she no longer expects anything from the guy, again writing him off and allowing him not to do shit for her. Chivarly isn't dead, ppl just act like it is.
Sheila:
i agree. chivarly wouldn't be dead on either side if ppl were appreciated more. dunno about you & your flower giving either..lol i'm not a fan of chicks giving me flowers. just feels all wrong, always wanna give them back or give them even more after that.
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